Happy Friday! New post about speculative history

Rome, one of the world's greatest civilizations, lasted as a Republic or Empire in some form for more than 1800 years, from 500 B.C. to 1453 A.D, but after 476 A.D., only the Eastern half of the Empire persisted, with the deposition of Romulus Augustus by the German warlord Odoacer in 476 A.D. The question I ask is this: What if Rome survived the crisis of the 5th century A.D., and continued to exist as a unified but jointly-ruled state, centered in Rome and Constantinople? There are numerous ways that this could have happened, but the most likely one is if the Romans had conquered Germany and not made the grievous error of underestimating Hermann, or "Arminius," the long-haired German king and fierce enemy of Rome, who slaughtered General Varus' legions at Teutoburg Forest in A.D. 9, drawing the Roman border west of the Rhine. Let's say, for instance, that Germany was conquered and Rome managed to win in A.D. 9. What consequences would a Roman Germany have for  Europe? The short answer is...huge. Germanic culture was very, very different than Roman culture, German language and runes looked and sounded totally different than the Roman alphabet and Latin, not to mention English is derived from Anglo-Saxon, which wrote in Germanic runes, so if Germany was conquered, there would be no modern English language, we would all speak Latin or some variant of it, and sound very much like modern Italians. The Germanic culture of heroism, brotherhood and the Comitatus, or "band of brothers" as seen in later Anglo-Saxon literature such as "Beowulf," would have been crushed, so there would be no Anglo-Saxon culture, German culture, Scandinavian culture or Slavic culture, Europe would have been completely Latin, under Roman control. Even with the introduction of Christianity, and the abandonment of pagan gods, the religion would have been instituted homogenously across Europe by Constantine the Great in the fourth century A.D., and all of Europe, Asia Minor, the Levant and North Africa would be made Christian in one fell swoop, therefore, missionaries and Christian crusades would never have been necessary, and neither would the Inquisition. There would be no Dark Age, no witch trials, no Renaissance and no Enlightenment, as there would be no need for Roman and Greek knowledge to be revived or re-propagated. Technology, science, philosophy, and progress would have continued unabated, and the crisis of the 5th century would have never happened at all, as there would be no barbarians to threaten the might of Rome. The empire would still have likely been divided along east and west to make governance easier, but the authority would still lie firmly in the hands of the Emperor in Rome. With the conquest of Germany and the vast forests of the Haidnur, the Old German word for a "black forest," Rome could build a massive Navy as well as its marching Legions, and huge ports would have been built all along the Roman coastline, to conquer new lands on overseas routes. Countries like China, India, Japan and the coasts of Africa, and yes, even the Americas, would have trembled in fear of the Roman Legions. They would have brought Christianity to those lands hundreds of years earlier than in the actual timeline of history, and established the Roman Colonial Empire, circa 900 A.D., consisting of coastal China, Japan, Korea, India, the coastline of Africa and North and South America. East Asia would have evolved as a mix of mostly Roman and some remnant Asian culture, creating an environment completely foreign to us today. The Romans would have forced all conquered people to learn Latin and enslaved millions of Japanese, Chinese, African, Indian and Native American peoples to maintain the Empire. The Japanese bathhouses would have been sacked by the Legions, the beautiful cherry groves of Kyoto burned to the ground, and any resistance to the might of Rome would have been completely and utterly destroyed. There would have been no British Raj, no French Revolution, no Napoleon, no Kaiser Wilhelm, no Columbus, no Cortes, no Pizarro, no Otto von Bismarck, and no Hitler. So, to summarize, if Germany had lost that battle in A.D. 9, the world today would likely be dominated by a uniform, Roman dictatorship that had kept the peace for more than 2,500 years, everyone would speak a language similar to Italian, and we would all be Christian, or whatever the Caesar in Rome said we were. An interesting thought, indeed.